so this morning i stopped expecting he'll read my mind (finally realized guys aren't that sensitive to carry out the signals... my bad) and i blurted out what's been bothering me.

and yeah, he didn't get it still... what's wrong with expecting to be treated a lil special on your birthday? doesn't every celebrant have that right?

he asked me if that was so important that i had to give up everything we had..

he never got it, he never will.. so i just gave up and said truthfully that i was expecting to spend some time with him last night, that he never paid attention to me and i pretty much spent my birthday alone...

he called 5 or six times after that.. but i had to work so we were always interrupted.


til i went home and still, the fickle finger of fate gave that moment that i was preparing my lunch that he called. damn it, i missed it again...




then at three he called again... finally!


i told him not to give me anything, just his time... i want to spend some time with him because this past weeks he's been so caught up with booting that he never notices whatever's happening each night...

i hope he catches up on that. what is wrong with him?!?



i hate it when he says he's dumb, because he's not. he's just insensitive sometimes... i discovered ( the hard way! ) that boys are numb in nature. he is a thick-skinned creature who has a very soft heart inside...

he said he never meant to be insensitive, and i needn't be jealous of his chat mates... im still his number one, er, only one... right...

then everything started falling in place again. i don't like it when it's his turn to apologize, because he's so truthful that it melts my heart... mmm.. i still love him in spite of what happened.


what is wrong with me??!?